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Monday, June 28, 2010

There's a Pterodactyl in our bathroom!

Oh what a day!

Firstly let me explain that I have two sick sons. Baby of 1 year has a cold and is also cutting a tooth, he is sooky, clingy and eating little food but breastfeeding around the clock! My other son of 3 years has had a fever, loss of appetite and has been just generally unwell. As you can imagine I got little sleep last night. 

It started when the baby had a bout of diarrhoea in the middle of the night, then, if I wasn't breastfeeding the baby than I was tending to the 3 year old by getting him a cup of water, taking him to the toilet, giving him cuddles and just being there when he would say "mama" in a whiny voice while half asleep, he would need just a gentle touch to his head or shoulder, which was enough to reassure him that I was still around and he would fall promptly back to sleep. 
When morning came, it was no better. Even though the children were ill it didn't affect their sleeping times and we were up at 6am. The children woke sick and cranky, they were lethargic and the little one had yellow boogers bubbling at the ends of his nostrils. My Husband decided that it was in my best interest (for the sake of my sanity and my life) that he should stay home from work to give me a hand, he explained that he would have to go to the work site to drop off some tools and he would be right back.

While hubby was gone I managed to get the baby a bit of toast, and I got the 3 year old dressed. Surprisingly I also managed to do the dishes while the baby hovered at my legs (wiping snot on my knees!). I went into the lounge room to breastfeed the baby. I looked at my other son who was slumpt on one of those foam fold-out children's lounges (actually, it was brand new for my baby sons first birthday a week ago). He sat there quietly with a sullen look on his face, dozing in and out of sleep, he didn't want breakfast and I asked him how he was feeling. Suddenly he looked at me with all this worry on his face but before he could finish the sentence "I'm going to vomit" it was pouring out of him, all down his front and all over the baby's new lounge. He started crying and I tried to reassure him that it was okay, I told him he could have a shower and I would get him clean clothes. I unlatched the baby, he screamed and screamed, I had just interrupted his feed, it's only the worst thing you can do to a baby!
Thankfully hubby arrived home at just the right time and we all managed to get showered and dressed, with the three year old announcing that he "felt much better now"! It was a beautiful winter's day with a clear sky and warm sun, so we decided to get out of the house for some fresh air, so we got in the car to go to the park. Just when everyone's all buckled in, the 3 year old vomits again. We all get out of the car, 3 year old showers again and exclaims that he "really feels better now" and begs us to go to the park. Hubby and I exchange one of those 'what do you think' glances and we say "okay". So the kids are back in the car, husband ready at the wheel and I say, "ooh I'll just grab my handbag" I turn to run inside but run smack into the door, the locked door, and guess where my house keys were, that's right, they were in my handbag, on the other side of the locked door! We were now locked out of the house.

Furious, hubby and I walk around the house hoping desperately that there is a window left ajar, no luck. 

Hubby takes hammer and puts it through en-suite window.

After cleaning up the glass, we take the window frame out and put it in the car to get fixed while we go to the park, we secure the window with the curtain and some heavy items at the bottom to weigh it down so it doesn't flap around in the breeze.

Right, ready to go, again! Thank fully we have a great time in the sun at the park, we have lunch and decide to head home before it gets cool. By the time we are home, baby is demanding another breast feed, I take position on the lounge, and watch hubby walk by with the newly fixed window in tow, not seconds later I hear hubby's voice echoing from the en-suite "Honey! There's a giant bird in our bathroom"!
"What"? "How giant"? I ask.
"ITS FREAKING PTERODACTYL" Hubby shouts. If it was anyone else I would probably have been in fits of laughter, but my hubby is no exaggerator and I find myself suddenly concerned. He urges me to come and have a look and so I do. I approached the en-suite door with caution, I peered in "Shit" I exclaimed, I was mortified, seriously I mean "shit" there was shit everywhere, all over the floor, all around the bath tub ledge, all over the WHITE bath towels! I wanted to cry, and then I saw the culprit, the Purple swamphen
How in the world does a bird that size get into a bathroom window? We were freaking out. It had claws that were as big as hubbys hands, they would rip you to shreds. Somehow, hubby manages to shoo the bird back out the window. Clean-up was NOT fun. Tooth brushes were thrown away, the tiles were scrubbed bare, the vanities were heavily disinfected and the towels are currently soaking in the washing machine (but I'm considering throwing them too). 

So let me just re-cap my day for you, it all started just after midnight with a poo explosion from the baby, then I continued to get in and out of bed for drinks, toilet trips, and cuddles. Daybreak brought with it a whole load of vomit x2 (and a whole load of washing). By midday we got in and out of the car 3 times, locked ourselves out of the house and now had a smashed en-suite window to deal with. Not to mention the constant flow of yellow snot bubbling from my baby's nose every 10 minutes! By the afternoon, just when I thought I had my fair share of cleaning up bodily secretions I then had to deal with a pterodactyl size bird who left a pterodactyl size mess all over our bathroom, giant green gooey bird shit, everywhere!

Could be day be any more bizarre? Now I'm exhausted and heading off to bed, hopefully the fumes from the disinfectant (we used an excessive amount) are strong enough to knock me out so I get a decent nights shut eye, and with any luck I'll wake in the morning to find it was just all a freakish nightmare.... pft I wish!

3 comments:

  1. What a day! That would have freaked me out completely. Good to see you can laugh about it. :-)

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  2. Checked out the towels this morning, no good. The bird poop has left a lime green/yellow stain on them, gross. In the bin they go!

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  3. lol thanks for the laugh =) Tina

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